I Am Brave Enough to Forgive


On my journey I have transformed how I perceive forgiveness. I used to think forgiveness was about blame. About being right. And who wants to forgive an asshole who's wrong anyways?

I have learned a few things about forgiveness:

1. Everyone is on their own journey

Who am I to say that another person is not doing their journey right? Even though I may not understand why someone acted a certain way, or behaved a certain way, or lied, or whatever. Is it really my business? Take responsiblity for your own energy and state of being, how you react is up to you. It can be challenging when the mind tells us they are wrong, collects evidence at how wrong they are, and views someone in that particular way for a long period of time. Connect with your heart. The heart loves. Always.

Have compassion. Realize that everyone suffers, and whatever the lesson is that that person needs or needed to learn, thats okay, and it's not your journey. You may not understand it, and that's okay. I always feel like people always do their best. Even if we don't understand it. Everyone suffers, and humans are crazy and interesting.

2. Forgiveness is for you

I think a common misconception with forgiveness is that you are putting the blame on yourself, feeling bad, and guilty, and wrong. Forgiveness is for you. It is not to shame you. It is to set you free. Put out the intention to forgive the person for what they have done. Also forgive yourself for what you have put into the relationship. It does not mean to blame yourself. It is to look at what you've put into the relationship, whether it is: playing the victim, having to be right, being inauthentic, whatever it may be, let it go with love. Find a body of water. Write down what you need to let go of on a rock, throw it in the water and surrender it to the earth. Set yourself and the other person free.

3. When we forgive we create space for love

We are on this journey to love, and what love does is heal. Forgiveness is for warriors. For those willing to be a stand for good and healing in this world. It may not always be easy, but take on the challenge. Take the steps you need to let go of the old, and create space for the new. Compassion teaches us that everyone is suffering in one way or another. Why add to it? Practice expanding your love energy with a metta meditation, yoga, digging your toes into the earth, and letting go. Start to tie up loose ends with those certain people in your life. "Resentment is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die"-Carrie Fisher

Remember that you are a powerful being, and their are other options than what your minds tell you daily. Open yourself up to new possibilities for your life, and your way of being. We are not told how much love is available to feel in this life. It is much more vast than we think. Sit in love every day-as much as you can. Call on it's energy, let it absorb into you. It's amazing.

Ideas: Make a forgiveness tree!

Draw a tree with branches and then cut out a bunch of leaves. On each leaf write something that needs forgiving in your life and attach it to the tree. Start each leaf with, "I forgive ____________ for _________________." This tree will represent the growth you have made throughout your life to get to the place where these things can be forgiven.

I got this idea from the book Sacred Pregnancy by Anni Daulter

Be gentle, nurturing and sweet to yourself.

In love ~ Ali

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